Now with its own blog!I just read Kepler's Bookstore goes out of business from Neil Gaiman's journal of all places. I'm totally stunned. I never really bought books there, because it's a little far for me and Books Inc is a local bookstore that's a little closer to me. Plus I just don't buy books that often anymore. I mostly get them from the library. But goodness me!
Okay, it seems worse than I thought it was. It's the worst hurricane in 100 years. But it's still not as bad as the hyperbole. Kathleen Blanco, the governor of Louisiana apparently said "This is a tragedy of great proportions, greater than any we've see in our lifetimes." However although it's been quoted all over the blogosphere, and rightly condemned, or at least pointed out as hyperbole, I could only find the quote in one news source, the Shreveport Times. Therefore I hope either the reporter caught the governor in an overwhelmed moment, or he misquoted her.
Tragedy, yes. I still feel really bad for the people affected. I was especially touched by the story Babies evacuated from the ICU, though I was annoyed that they added the bit on the end about looting. Is it looting or finding bread and soda?
I keep seeing these two photos captioned with a white male and a mixed race woman "finding bread and soda" and a black male "looting". The first time was from Jkfabiani. Even if the facts are true, the wording is dangerous.
And omg omg experts expect gas to be $4 a gallon And yes it's related to Hurricane Katrina...supposedly. IMO any excuse to gouge us at the pump. Even though the US pays the lowest at the pump.
In another case of nothing is ever simple with Little T, he has a horrid raging rash on his left arm, which is eczema. It's a lot worse, because the circulation there is very poor due to his tumour. Unfortunately the eczema's infected and crusted over, so he needs to ingest an antibiotic Keflex three times a day as well as have steroid cream rubbed on the rash. Amazingly he likes the taste of the Keflex syrup, so our nanny was able to just give it to him with no fuss.
His barium swallow study yesterday showed normal swallowing. So we're moving onto the next step to figure out why he's not eating, which is a PH study on September 12th. They stick a probe down his throat for 24 hours. It sounds very uncomfortable, but we really need some answers. He's advancing in every way except eating. He's been off chemo since June 8th, but his eating in the past couple weeks has been worse not better despite an increase in Prilosec. He throws up every morning. Maybe he has motility issues.
Whenever I would say I'm not happy, because we're not making any progress, she would get defensive. So I just switched to her attending doctor. I feel a little bad about it, but it's not because she's a PNP. I'm happy to see PNP in Hemo. It means that things are going well with Little T. I switched because Little T has made no progress in GI under her care and I find it difficult to get along with her. And I have since my first apt with her when she said he was "overfed" when he was not gaining weight at that time.
God, I first took him to GI on May 25. That was a lifetime ago in terms of his other issues. He was still on chemo. He could barely sit up. He had just started making noise. We were amazed he could use his right arm to yank things. You've come a long way, baby. Okay, I feel better now.
To me, potty training is when the child goes to the bathroom completely on their own. Special K's starting to do this. She went on her own several times yesterday and today. She even washes her hands. We're very proud.
Our use of soap and tp have both gone up dramatically -- a small price to pay. Our use of diapers have gone down dramatically. So all in all, a win for the planet.
I sent off my children's picture book. It's the first time I've sent a submission via snail mail. I really love this book. Evidently so do other people. I got some great endorsements. I'm really excited about it. Now I just have to wait and wait and wait to hear back from the publisher. Please wish me luck. My submission "fills a void" "providing a real service to parents everywhere" but it will be in the dreaded slush pile, so I'll need it.
A Slate article on European mail vs. American mail I don't agree with the article. Though I agree that Europeans are much more likely to start an emai with "Dear".
Natural Gas Vehicle - It seems like a better solution than hydrogen fuel cells, because you still have to make the hydrogen from dirty fuel sources.
Kynn got this image from the LJ image feed
that literally pulls images from Live Journal.
Tempest brews over quotes on Starbucks cups.
I've never been a big fan of Starbucks, but it makes me want to go buy Starbucks right now. I left a commment at the Starbucks website. I encourage you to do the same.
Here's what I wrote
Thanks for your The Way I See It #43 quote from Armistead Maupin. I really enjoyed reading it. I support the free expression of ideas. I don't like the religious right's attempts to suppress ideas and try to get you to pull the cups. I put your cup on my blog and I told my friends about it. Free advertising for you. If you bow to pressure and pull the cups, I'll also blog about that and boycott Starbucks.
Plantgirl blogs :Does this seem bizarre to anyone else?": Judge orders force-feeding for convicted sniper
Not to me. Of course it's cheaper to put someone in prison for life than to pay all the court costs of putting them to death. But the death penalty isn't about cost. It's about revenge. And if the sniper starves himself to death, then no-one gets revenge.
I'm a bad blogger I suppose in that I haven't been following Hurricane Katrina until I read this breath of fresh air with all the wailing in the media I've been reading about the hurricane. (pardon the pun) I don't actually know anyone in New Orleans, so that's definitely part of it. If anyone reading this has been affected by Hurricane Katrina, my heart goes out to you and your family.
But I also thought those folks would all be okay and they were. Don't get me wrong. I really wouldn't want to be one of the thousands in the SuperDome waiting and wondering if my house was going to be okay. But I'd rather be one of them than one of the tsunami victims who had no warning and suffered terribly. Of course I'd rather be me. But my point isn't really about pain and suffering. It's more about how terribly self-absorbed most Americans are. Do you know there are people in Niger are starving? Okay it's a cliche to write about starving people. Still, people don't blog about that as often as it deserves. Neither did I until now. I'll try to provide more balanced coverage when I do blog about world events.
I thought this was an interesting idea: Poetry on Demand
I'm so excited I can hear Anne Lamott speak at the CAR Luncheon. A friend is on the Book Committe that chooses the speakers, so will get me a seat. I missed last year's because Little T was back in the hospital again. I really really really hope I can go this year. I'll be bouncing to my haircut just thinking about it.
Anne Lamott wrote Bird By Bird, which has been an inspiration to me as a writer. I have no idea why no-one shoved this book into my shaking hands when I expressed doubt in my writing ability, but consider this a virtual shoving. I wish I'd taken one of her classes at the UC Berkeley Extension. Ah, well.
Little T just learned how to raspberry. He raspberries with great concentration and effort with a very serious expression. Then he grins hugely. It's really cute. He also said "bah" once for the first time yesterday. Perhaps the two are related. In any case, I think raspberries are a milestone. His OTs keep asking if he does them.
I told Special K a month or so ago that she must never go into someone's house or car unless Mummy or Daddy says it's okay, even if it's someone she knows. Today she told me that our nanny asked her if she would go with her to her friend's house and she said no. Now this may be the same incident that I talked to her and our nanny about a month ago. Special K's sense of time is a little strange. However it does mean that the lesson has stayed with her. I consider this her first lesson in personal safety. It's too bad I have to start teaching her so young.
For the first time since Little T was born, C is more than a hundred miles away and will be gone more than 24 hours. Definitely a milestone. He's at my brother's bachelor's weekend and will be back later today. So far so good.
And I'll end on a kid-related, but non-milestone related note: As soon as Special K falls asleep, Little T wakes up. How does he know? He's upstairs in his cot. She's downstairs sleeping on the couch.
I went to my neurologist on Friday and he suggested Topamax. He said my vertigo which seems to be increasing in frequency may actually be a symptom of migraines. I guess that makes sense. Topamax treats migraines and seizures. He said he wanted me to try the Haldol again later, but I'm not keen on it. Especially since he said that some of my jerking seems to be tics perhaps related to ADHD. I know that ADHD is not one of my problems. If anything, I sometimes get too absorbed in something. I tried Topamax for the first time last night. So far I didn't notice anything, but it's a ramp up dose. I take 25mg at night for two weeks, then ramp up to 50mg. Then I see him again in a month.
A zillion bloggers have blogged about Harry Potter. I hope what I have to say is at least somewhat original since I was struck by the way motherhood was portrayed in this book. The rest of my remarks are in the comments to avoid spoilers for the few who still haven't read Harry Potter.
Go here to see how I scored on 3 silly quizzes. Please feel free to respond with your own scores.
I just realised I'm much more nervous about being a bridesmaid at my brother's wedding than a bride at my own. I knew I was marrying the right guy, so the rest was gravy. I figured if I made a total idiot of myself at my wedding, at least I'd end up with C at the end of it.
We had a lovely wedding, even though apparently someone did try to ruin it by making a big fuss. However we didn't hear about it until afterwards and this person fortunately only seemed to affect those immediately around them.
It was one of the best days of my life. I was filled with joy. People blog all the time about love and sometimes it sounds so simple and it isn't really. But I do have one simple thing to say about love. To me, love means that occasionally if it's only for a moment, you honestly and truly believe the person is the most amazing being on earth and it's because they did something that lights you up. For me, one of those moments was my wedding day. But weddings are often like that. There have to be others. Another for me was when C truly laughed at my silly jokes when Little T was so sick.
Sometimes people mistake love for I think X is the most amazing being on earth, because I love X. That's not love. That's tautology. If you never feel that way about your SO, it's not love, it's desperation or low self-esteem or something else that keeps you with that person. These feelings of amazement are usually fleeting and they never last. But those moments keep me going in the bad times. IMO sheer will power won't do it alone if you never have the moments of joyful amazement. It's also not worth it. Making a marriage last is hard work. Why do it if not for joy?
Some folks who've been married for a long time say you need to be able to fall in love again. I think I'm saying the same thing.
Sayeth blogged about the controversy stirred by the fact that in the series entitled "Dialogues between Neuroscience and Society", the Dalai Lama will give a talk on "The Neuroscience of Meditation". (See program guide description)
In response I wrote:
It sounds silly to me since a talk on meditation is not "advancing religious beliefs." I'm sure some of the other speakers giving talks are devout followers of various faiths. I see nothing wrong with say a devout Christian giving a talk on say brain aging as long as they confine the talk to brain aging. Even if their interest in aging stems from their spiritual beliefs.
I essentially turned down the job ping by saying that I was only interested in part-time work. I thought about it for a day or two. We don't see a way for both C and I to work full-time and do all the things that need to be done for Little T. He has OT every week, which I could ask our nanny to take him to, but then he has other apts like his modified barium swallow, which take hours and he really needs a parent there. C wouldn't be happy working part-time. I'm not sure I would either, but that's another topic.
But the main reason boils down to I really want to give writing a shot and I definitely can't seriously write, work full-time and look after my family. It's one thing not to look for a job to write. It's a big deal to not pursue a job ping that comes out of the blue. I feel I made the right decision, but I'm quite scared. Actually I'm terrified. All my life I've been sensible about money. At age 25, I bought my first house on my own in the bay area, because I'd saved enough. Sure I've worked for several startups, but I always got a paycheck.
I wrote this is the first time I'm consciously choosing not to get a paycheck. That's not actually true. I was a computer consultant out in Philly and had a growing list of clients. In Dec '93 I left all that. I drove out to the bay area with no job to move in with housemates I'd met only over the Internet. It was one of the best decisions of my life. Then as now, I had this feeling that things would work out fine mixed with the sheer terror and exhilaration of leaping off a cliff. Breathe in. Breathe out. Please wish me luck.
The continuing saga of Thida, which I'd typed up for a bboard a year or so ago. Please let me know if you like it. If you hate it, well I'll interpret silence as no-one wants to read about my past.
At age 8, my parents decided to send me off to West Downs the boys’ boarding school run by my grandparents. I loved the academics, because it had a well-deserved good reputation and you moved up in the classes according to how well you do on the exams rather than by age. I loathed everything else about it. I missed my family terribly. It was cold and draughty. I was one of only 10 girls in a school of 200. And most of the kids hated me on sight, because I was the headmaster’s grand-daughter. Two of my cousins were also there, but they had started before me and they stuck together. I think they knew I wasn’t going to be there for the long-term. They also weren’t nerds and were good at sports, so they fit in better.
But I did have one friend named Victoria Morse. She was a fellow nerd. I lost contact with her, but I still think fondly of her. Hey, it's interconnected world out there, so I'll give it a shot. If anyone for some reason knows a Victoria Morse in England, please tell her to contact me.
My parents decided to move to California and while they were getting things sorted out, for a couple months they moved into the flat where my grandparents lived at West Downs. We weren’t allowed to see each other any more often than other families, which was once a week on the weekends. Then my parents took a cross-country trip across the US for a couple months. They took my brother and sister and left me behind at West Downs. My brother really really missed me and began every postcard with “Dear Thida, I miss you a lot.” I think the only good thing I can really say about that year and a half is that I gained a new appreciation of my brother.
So at age 9 and 9 months, I went from West Downs to 6th grade at a Catholic school in Davis California called St. James. I suffered massive culture shock. I thought boys were for kicking not kissing.
Sorry for the silence. Been working on my writing, specifically my children's book. I got comments that I will put on the jacket cover of the book when it's published. Woo hoo! I say when optimistically, of course. It's almost ready, but I had to buy labels and 9x12 envelopes and format the manuscript, etc. Formatting always takes far more time than you think it should.
I had a friend in college who used to say "Stop the world! I want to get off!" I don't exactly feel that way, but my brain is definitely overloaded.
I just forgot one of Little's T apts. He has a lot of apts, but forgetting one totally is a first for me. I've had some near misses when I remembered minutes before the apt, but never total amnesia before. I'm quite embarassed. I also recognise in some way my brain is overloaded with info, so some of it fell out. Most of them are really good things, but I have a background anxiety that I could get personal bad news. Little T's relapse happened just after we had a joyous Xmas.
So here's a partial brain dump of what's on my mind:
Big Gay Rights news that I learned from Owl's moose's LJ.
SF Gate has the headline
Court grants equal rights to same-sex parents I think that's great news for the kids of same-sex parents.
OTOH Owlmoose points out there are 3 anti-gay initiatives on the special election ballot.
I hope the court ruling won't provoke a backlash and get folks to vote for these initiatives.
Okay, maybe this isn't news to you, but it's news to us. Little T's arm has grown slowly from 15cm to 19cm and in the past couple weeks, his arm developed an angry red rash. Last night C and I had a difficult conversation in which we prepared for the worst. Fortunately his hemo doctor says the rash is a yeast infection and the growth of his arm is real growth -- he has a noticeable bicep now. Woo hoo!
Despite my fears, he's still gaining weight. He's now 8080 grams, but he hasn't grown since his GI apt on Aug 5, because he's still 66cm long. However his head is still above the 50th percentile at 46cm. Grow head grow! May I also say that my son has enormous ears which in Burma are a sign of great intelligence. His hemo doctor said "He looks particularly cute". She mentioned the lack of an NG tube. I said dryly, "Yes, I suppose the tube did rather detract from his appearance." and we all laughed.
We met yet another resident. They always say they remember Little T from some particular hospital stay, but I never remember them. Well I'll probably remember that poor resident in her first week when Little T had line sepsis for the rest of my life. But no-one before and since has said to me "Wait, I need to write this down first." after they walk up to me. The other residents all seem eager and sometimes little intimidated by Little T's huge medical records, but reasonably polished and always polite. This one spotted that my doctor is still listed somewhere as Little T's doctor. My doctor is an adult doctor and when I saw him last week, he said he's still getting info about Little T. Now I know at least one reason why.
For the first time, a lab tech drew Little T's blood with one stick. He dug around some, but still. Next time we'll ask for Sean and use numbing cream first.
